/i lie in bed and listen to
offbeat thump of my heart to
tick - ing of the clock to
creak - ing stairway
hushed voices.
- contained within the distant high pitched scream of silence
emitting from amber and emerald walls.

yellow, they say, is for luck.

green, for the numb - ness that is
s l i d i n g
deep
in
side
of
m
e
.

/eleven.
the ring - ing of the tel e p hone
jolts me from my reverie -
his voice murmers empty words of adoration over the layers of static -
but his
hand i can - not touch.
the cold from the icecube he passes to hot lips for-got-ten.
noiseless tears do not betray
this helpless desperation. urgency. rush. wave. surge.
pain.
- i do not add to the silence anymore.

/isolated.
alone.
nothing.
invisible.
i.
am.
again.
life, they say, becomes an empty big hole.

why, thy love, delicate and sweet, torment me so?

- p u r l -

..........

well its not totally autobiographical..

i think i sorta know why i like garden state that much.. its not an amazing movie with any wonderful effects or anything.. but esp the ending the character natalie portman plays reminds me of myself. i can understand her pleas and that urgency. well i dont know. sigh, i dont know anything.