*phone rings* oh.. its only ahbi.

u know what sucks? sometimes u wait past 12:45.. thinking u should might as well just go to bed... and find that u just cant bloody sleep. then u get a msg.. Oh.. lets turn the comp on again... to find no one of importance online. psh. back to facing another hour of insomia. well, thats nothing.. why would anyone believe someone is looking for another person all night? i guess my "belief" that everyone i hold dear should have a cell phone is wrong. *shrugs*

well, u know what else sucks? when u get home after stomping around in snow right up to your knees(yes im flippin short) and being bored and then sit around on the verge of a teary tantrum constantly hoping he randomly calls u(even by mistake) or comes online not for you, but maybe to download something.. and end up having pretentious asses who badger u with false concern and painfully fake enthusiasm. its worse when they seem to have decided that they are now personally in charge of your welfare and happiness by harping how fukin' awesome life really is. sighs, how the heck would they know anything about bad lonely days that run on consectutively for a year and how my fluctuating moods long to shatter that jaw that holds that pretty huge smile of theirs? and then later scramble to make up for it saying, oh its just me today. *rollseyes* jesus.

gah, maybe i should just go to the gym again. wait.. it closes at 6. dammit. well whatever, dad wants me to shovel the snow again.. and i unintentionally skipped lunch already anyways.. if only i can unintentionally skip everything else too......

tomorrow i go.. i can almost visualize fat cells multiplying geometrically inside me while i sit on my huge ass doing nothing but wriggling my fingers at the keyboard.

stupid economics article is driving me insane. CONFUSION!! sighs, i'll get back to it after this. and that stupid bibleBS. seriously my dear god, get another job. u suck at this. ur followers cant even accept the fact that ur wonderous son may look just like any other guy from israel.. so sad. i hope they fight more and end up slitting each others throat at night. love thy neighbour and forgive their sins my ass.

maybe i should just sleep life off? how does that sound? i would need the help of alooott of tranquilizers though.

sigh, the cold. sometimes i cant even sleep because of it.. damm furnace. no well i want to blame god again. how come no one is out to shoot me yet? or am i going to pay on judgement day?

"up yours jack!" - my selfculturesociety prof.. *lol* dont know why i thought of it out of nowhere.. he said it while describing an analogy to explain self regulating markets.. colonel sanders swore!! man, i love hearing that guy talk.. he's so funny.. its just hard to pay attention once he talks for more than an hour.

*rollseyes* ok fine im gonna read antidurhing now. THERES A DURH IN THE TITLE! anti-durh-ing! hahaa is that what socialism is about?